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A Mother's Musings

Allow me to stray a bit from my typical blog content, and reflect on something the Lord is working on in my heart.  

This last weekend was Mother's Day, as you well know.  Over the last few years, since becoming a new mom, this has quickly become my favorite holiday.  My favorite holiday used to be Valentines Day--anyone else love to hand out valentines to all your friends?    I will still hold a special fondness for Valentines Day, but these days the position of favorite goes to Mother's Day.  

The reason I love Mother's Day so much has everything to do with my three boys, and my husband, who does a wonderful job of honoring me.  I cherish this day as a time to remember my first son, Collin, and the blessing he was and is to us.  I also stop with renewed reverence as I thank God for the gifts he has given me in my sons.  It is such a privilege to be a mom, and sometimes I can forget that.  Sometimes I forget how great a responsibility the Lord has given me to nurture and LOVE my boys. (Titus 2:4, "...admonish the young women to...love their children.")  It is a God-given responsibility to instruct them in the things of the Lord and make sure they are learning how to act in society.  Not to mention, keeping them safe and healthy (these two things can prove very difficult at times, with boys!)  I thank God for making me a mom!

In the last 8 months I have been challenged a few times in my parenting.  God has brought some circumstances into our lives that has made this burden for mothering much greater on my heart.  I have had to deal with tough questions like, how can I really keep my children safe from people who want to harm them or don't love them with a Christlike love?  Or, how can I trust that everyone has my child's best interest in mind?  Or, should I compromise my view of parenting when another parent wants me to more closely resemble theirs?  These questions, and others like them, were not just ones that popped into my head from some irrational fear or insecurity...they are valid questions that were raised because of some difficult and uncomfortable circumstances.  These questions are also raised simply because we move so often...how do we know who to trust with our kids if we just met them two weeks ago--this is a constant situation we face.   

I am still working through the process of considering these questions and not letting it slip into irrational fear, distrust or bitterness.  It is good to be careful, but not to worry or have irrational fear.  The Lord protects, the Lord is sovereign.  He loves my boys even more than I do.  He does always have their best interest in mind and He will take care of us through any circumstance. 

I am convinced that these are good questions to think through and answer, seeking God's wisdom.  As Judah and Asher's mom, I am supposed to be guarding their hearts and minds and keeping them safe.  It is my job to be watchful, to be careful, to be alert and protective.  To take precautions and foresee danger.  To feed them when they are hungry and to feed them spiritually as well.  When my patience is thin, to draw on the strength of the Lord to show them Christlike love and humility.  I get the privilege of doing this and of loving them unconditionally.  In return I have the pleasure of receiving their love, but I also more fully understand God and His love for me.  

Being a mother is a blessing!  Nothing has taught me more about myself and about God.  As my boys grow bigger and we have the joy of interacting and communicating more with each other, I only realize this blessing and responsibility more.  I thank God for giving my sons to me and that includes my dear Collin, who I treasure and look forward to seeing again in heaven.  

I hope you all had a wonderful Mother's Day, remembering your moms and, if it applies, thanking God for your children.  I hope you all have a good week!  Thanks for reading and for praying!


Got an update?


We have been having a wonderful time updating our supporting churches on the weekends.  It has been a bit tiring for Andy to take on this extra responsibility in addition to his work week, but the blessing of being with our supporting churches and seeing some individuals who support us has been invaluable for all of us.  Andy and I so much enjoy being in churches and the opportunities we get for ministry.  Andy has enjoyed getting to preach again and I have loved doing my part in the presentation and reconnecting with old friends.  Last week we were privileged to visit a church in Rome, NY, where we got reacquainted with friends who are now the pastor at the church.  They have 3 beautiful children and our 2 boys absolutely loved playing with them!  Judah still talks about his new friends.  So, we have enjoyed the blessings God has given our boys during this busy time too.  

Please pray for us as we continue our meetings.  We have one near NYC this weekend (April 22nd), and then we will leave for meetings in the Delaware, Maryland, Virginia area.  I would specifically ask for your prayer as I prepare for a devotional that I have to give on May 4th.  I will be speaking to ladies during their mother/daughter banquet in Manassas, VA.

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers!

I <3 NY!

One of the benefits of moving so often with our missionary work, is the privilege of being able to see some of our nation's notable attractions that all of the sudden become local sites for us.  Last weekend I had the privilege to be in New York City with my twin sister, Deborah.  She came from Sioux City, IA to visit us on our current building project in New York.  After we picked Deborah up at the airport, Andy took the boys and let Deb and I make our way to the city for a fun sister weekend.  It was so fun and memorable.  I'm so thankful to God for keeping us safe and for allowing us the opportunity to do that together.  

Since my sister is pregnant and restricted from walking too much, we decided to not try and do EVERYTHING that there is to do in NYC.  Instead, we window shopped on 34th St. and along Broadway.  We enjoyed supper at Ellen's Stardust Cafe and were treated to live music by the singing servers who are aspiring Broadway stars.  Thanks to a special gift, we were able to enjoy a Broadway show as well.  On Saturday morning we woke up bright and early and walked to Rockefeller Plaza to hopefully make it on TV on the Today Show.  Did you see us?  

I think our favorite part was going to Central Park on Saturday morning and enjoying a Starbucks coffee on one of the park benches.  This is my third time to the city, and I've decided that Saturday morning is definitely the time to be out and enjoy the city!  It is so quiet, peaceful and spacious (comparatively speaking).  Our last stop before heading home was to see the Statue of Liberty from the Staten Island Ferry.  

We got home on Saturday afternoon and Deborah left the next day.  We were both tired, she was probably exhausted, but it was such a great weekend!  It meant a lot to have her visit us and we will always remember our time together in NYC! 

A special thank you to Deborah for coming, to her husband, Luke, and her in-laws, Mark and Jo, for keeping her two girls while she was gone.

The blessing of help:

Recently we were blessed to have a group from one of our supporting churches in Pennsylvania come up to help with the building project here in New York.  The group included several very capable men who volunteered their services for a week.  Three of the men's wives came along as well to provide snacks and meals for the week.  While the group was here they were able to build a garage for the parsonage and also complete the shingling on the entire parsonage.  A few of the men also helped Andy with his electrical work inside the building.  It was amazing to see how fast they worked and what they were able to accomplish in just a week's time!  

There are several reasons why this group was such a blessing to us.  The primary reason was just the Christian fellowship we were able to share.  It was an encouragement to have their help, but also their personalities, which added a different and fun atmosphere to the work week.  I mentioned the ladies who came along to make the food--well, they not only fed their own group, but they also fed us builders!  We ate lunch and dinner (and sometimes snacks) with the group every day!  What a blessing!  Around about Tuesday, I stopped to wonder why I had so much extra time to play outside with my boys....then I realized: it's because I don't have to cook!  We loved not having to cook and also having their fellowship for every meal.  Our son, Judah, especially enjoyed their company!  He remembers his new friends with fondness and misses eating and playing with them.  His favorite was playing the guitar and singing with them.  

One of the biggest ways that the group blessed us was just by being there.  What a blessing it is as a missionary to have one of our supporting churches care enough about us and the work that we are doing--enough to volunteer of their valuable time and COME!  It is difficult to express how much it means to us that our supporting church cares about us.  We loved seeing their familiar faces (perhaps every missionary would understand the blessing of seeing a familiar face after being surrounded with unfamiliar faces in a new area).  I feel like we got to know them so much better and vice versa.  This will be a very special church to us for years to come!


Concrete Jungle

Below is a blog entry I wrote on November 19th.  I have not posted it until now because we have been having issues with our internet and computer.  You may be happy to know that I have since stopped searching for the illusive baby formula at our local Walmart-- One: because I don't need it anymore (yea!!) and Two: because I now know that it is located by the checkout aisle.  hmmm.  I would have never looked there!
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We're not quite in New York City, but we are still experiencing our fair share of culture shock here in the shadow of Albany, NY.  Our home is about 8 miles driving distance from Albany, which of course translates into 20-25 minutes drive time.  (We no longer equate miles traveled with minutes on the road!  Drive time used to be simple: 15 miles meant 15 minutes.  Not here.) 

I am enjoying getting to know our new home, but my 3+ hour trip to Walmart today almost did me in.  It is only 4.5 miles from my home, but somehow it took me 20 minutes to find the parking lot.  Once I got in the store, I was pleased to find that I didn't immediately feel "turned around".  Have you ever walked into a different store (same chain, different store) and discovered that the whole store seems turned around: The grocery aisles are where the pharmacy should be and the check out lines are on the wrong end?  This happens to me most every time I walk into a new Walmart.  I get used to the one in my town, then I move and have to figure out a new one.  It's just another adjustment to make in a life of frequent relocation.  Anyway, like I said, I was glad that I did not immediately feel discombobulated.  Key word: IMMEDIATELY.  It did come, eventually.  Most likely because this Walmart has two floors--Yes, two floors!  The first floor was grocery, pharmacy, paper goods, cleaning supplies, hygiene products, etc.  The second floor contains the clothes, home goods, do it yourself supplies, baby supplies, shoes, crafts, etc.  Needless to say, it took me much longer to accomplish my shopping list!  Of course they had to put the baby section on the top floor in the very opposite side of the elevators (oh yeah, they have elevators and escalators that accommodate your shopping cart).  I had two highly annoying experiences during my first Walmart endeavor.  The first was the absence of the baby formula.  I searched the baby section high and low and STILL could not find the baby formula.  You would think it would be in the baby food section, but it wasn't!  Thankfully, I am not out of formula right now because I never found the formula.  Where else could it be?  The second annoyance was when I was looking for some window suction hooks.  I went to the craft section on the second floor and could not find them.  I finally found someone working there and asked her where they could be.  She told me they are in the "Kids Crafts" section on the bottom floor in the back of the store.  Of course.  Silly me, checking in the "adult" craft section.  Funny!  Oh well!  I know it will get easier the more I practice!  : )


New York, at last!

Well, we made it to New York!  Thank you all for praying for us as we were trying to make our way here!  To review: we left Iowa on November 1st and made it as far as South Bend, IN, where our truck broke down.  In really simple terms, the drive shaft and transfer case dropped out from underneath the truck while we were driving down the interstate.  It was a difficult two days as we tried to line up tow trucks, a parking spot for our trailer, a mechanic, lodging, etc.  The Lord truly helped us as we felt completely at a loss when first faced with our situation!  Some of the details were worked out quickly, but some were not.  We ended up towing the truck to a friend's house in Sauk City, WI (our last build site location).  Our friend is a Dodge mechanic, so he graciously offered to not only work on our truck for us, but to also keep our family in his family's home while we waited for the truck to be fixed.  We were there for a full week.  We left again for New York on November 11th and arrived at our new home in Guilderland on the 12th.  The truck ran great!  Praise the Lord!

We are thankful for the CBM mission family and our friends who helped us in so many ways!  God took care of us and we feel humbly blessed as we see how God's people have given of their varied resources to help us.  Many of you have asked how you might give to help us with our growing financial need.  As we look at all of our expenses, we estimate the total added cost to us was around $2000.  (This total would have been much more had our friend in Wisconsin not helped us with the repairs!  He saved us thousands of dollars!)  The best way to give would be through our mission agency's website: cbmoffice.org.  On the right side of the page you will see a "Give A Gift" link.  Clicking on that link will direct you to the pay portal.  The memo on your gift should include our names.  Thank you if you give, and thank you for praying for us!  We are so grateful for God's loving care and that He uses His people to be such a blessing in our lives.  We have seen this time and time again and we remain humbled.  God is good; we have much to be thankful for!

We are mostly settled in our new location.  We are so thankful to be here safely!  Andy has this week off of work because of the Thanksgiving holiday, so we are making the most of it!  We will be working on getting our trailer home ready for the winter, decorate for Christmas, eat Thanksgiving dinner, and celebrate two birthdays: Asher's FIRST! and my 29th. 

We hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday and that God's blessings will be at the forefront of your minds!

Thank you again for your prayers for our family!


Life is anything but boring...

God is keeping our life interesting.  I feel like my life is in a state of constant upheaval lately.  There is so much inconsistency in the day to day schedule when we are moving our home and switching project locations.  Not to mention traveling on the weekends in order to update our supporting churches.  All these things are good and exciting, but after awhile, can make me long for a "normal" life where we don't move 3+ times a year.  Recently, this longing was brought to the forefront of my mind...

This last week, while we were on our way to New York for our next building project, we had a major disruption in our plans (but we rest in knowing that nothing was a surprise to God.)  Andy and Judah were in the truck pulling our trailer home behind them.  I was in the van with Asher following them.  We were nearing exit 77 on I 80/ 90, near South Bend, IN.  Andy called and said something didn't sound right with the truck, so he was going to exit and check it out.  Not 1 minute later, a huge dust erupted from under the truck and loud noises of "mechanics" hitting the pavement flooded my ears.  I could hardly believe what I was seeing.  Pieces from our truck were flying all over the interstate.  I saw Andy coast a few more yards in order to reach the next exit, but I stopped right away so I could get out of the car and check out what had fallen from the truck.  Andy came back to me to see what in the world I was doing, and he began to understand what we were looking at: his u-joint, driveshaft, etc.  We were in shock as we looked at everything, realizing how big of a repair this was going to be.

We spent the rest of the day calling tow companies and friends and family, trying to formulate a plan of action.  This is what we settled on: a missionary friend came down from our home office in Rockford, MI and he pulled our trailer to a church parking lot in Stevenville, MI.  Our truck stayed parked where it was in front of a toll plaza until we could arrange for a tow truck to take it to Sauk City, WI, where a friend of ours is a certified Dodge mechanic.  He offered to do all the work for free, all we need to pay is for parts.  What a blessing to have God's people rally around us to help us in our time of need! 

We spent that night in our trailer home at the church in MI and woke up the next morning to drive back to our truck and try to arrange for towing service through AAA.  After FOUR hours on the side of the road with two little boys who did NOT want to be stuck in the van, we finally had a tow truck come who could help us with our problem.  He towed us to Joliet, IL, where Andy's brother, Jeremy, met us with a flat bed trailer on which to haul our truck up to WI. 

Today (Friday) we are here in WI, waiting for parts to come in so that our truck can get fixed.  The same friend who is fixing the truck is also letting us stay at their house for however long we are here.  They are a blessing to us.  We know that this may be a lengthy layover.  We are disappointed to not be in NY yet, but thankful that God kept us safe and is providing for us in this unexpected trial. 

Please pray that God would help this truck repair to go smoothly and that after it all, our truck would run well and would be able to finish pulling our trailer home to NY where we are supposed to participate in our next building project.  Please thank God for the friends and family who helped us while we were in such need.  Please ask God to help us with the very real financial burden that we now have--He is already providing!  Praise Him!

Thank you all for your prayers!  Next time I hope to write to you from Guilderland, NY!

It's raining acorns!

Oh, the pleasures of being parked beneath two huge oak trees!  The past two weeks it has been literally raining acorns on our home.  If we lived in a normal house, we would probably hardly notice this natural occurrence, but since we live in our 5th-wheel trailer, we hear every single acorn that falls.  It's like when it rains, we hear every single rain drop that falls.  The latter is nice and can even be comforting or lull us to sleep, the former does much the opposite.  It sounds like we are being attacked or that someone is constantly throwing rocks at our home.  I must say that today it is better though.  Where as we used to hear a few acorns every 5-10 seconds, today it has been a few every 2-3 minutes.  Either the squirrels are done jumping around the trees with their harried gathering, or maybe the acorns are just done falling.  Well, we won't be here much longer to "enjoy" this mild annoyance.  We will be leaving Sauk City on October 13th and heading for our property in Marshalltown, IA.  We look forward to living on our land and working on the maintenance issues there.  We will also be traveling every weekend to update some of our supporting churches.  We are updating churches in Nebraska, Minnesota and Iowa.  Appreciate your prayers as we pack things up and leave friends here and as we do lots of traveling next month!

A little help, please?!

How many of you find it difficult to ask for help?  I am raising my hand too.  I have theories on why I have trouble asking for help; excuses why I should and like to be self-sufficient.  I'm very tempted to lay those out for you right now, in fact.  But, instead of doing that, I want to tell you about what God did in my quiet times this week, and how He is helping me.

If you're like me and every other parent in this world, you are often left in bewilderment and stand in confusion as to how to handle certain situations with your children.  As Judah, our oldest living son, reaches 2 1/2 next month, he is getting to be more independent and tends to assert that independence in new and sometimes undesirable ways each day.  Recently we have tried to encourage his independence in one area: potty training.  It's been a work in progress for almost three weeks now.  He has had really good days, but this week he has seemed to have a setback. 

As I have been navigating this training process and as I see Judah's new struggles with independence and obedience emerge, I got to the point of just total confusion, disillusionment and an overwhelming feeling of inadequacy.  (Ever been there?)  One day during my devotions, it was difficult for me to focus as I had these issues on my mind.  So, I prayed about them, and it occurred to me that I should have been doing that all along, but it's just hard for me to ask for help--even from God!  So, I began to ask God to give me wisdom into Judah's spirit and personality and God-inspired words to teach and train him. 
I found encouragement in this time of prayer, and then I decided to open my Bible and start reading.

As I was turning to the text in Galatians, I "just happened" to open the Bible to 1 Samuel where there was an ultrasound picture of one of my baby boys.  I automatically assumed it was a picture of Collin, thinking that I probably would have kept his ultrasound picture close since those are some of the only pictures we have of him.  But, as I looked more closely, I realized it was the first ultrasound picture we had of JUDAH, taken when I was just 57 days pregnant (only 11 days after I knew I was expecting again).  This picture reveals nothing about Judah's form, all you can see is just a speck of white that we were told was a baby.  I didn't even know this picture was in my Bible, but as I sat staring at what I knew now to be my boy Judah, I cried, knowing that even as a month old embryo, my God KNEW Judah perfectly: He knows Judah's petite form, his friendly(!) personality, his overwhelming joys, his tragic sorrows...everything about him--better than I do!  And as I considered this truth, I realized that God was telling me that He would help me parent Judah in a way that is perfect for Judah.  He knows Judah perfectly and established me to be his mommy.  What a privilege and what a responsibility! 

This week I learned again to be okay with asking God for help.  I can't do it on my own, and I'm absolutely not meant to!  God has given me help in the form of a wonderful husband and father to our boys, and He has promised to give me wisdom if I ask.  (James 1:5) 

I'm so thankful to be a mother who has God as my helper!

Our next project

The location of our next building project has been revealed to us.  We will be serving with Grace Baptist Church in Guilderland, NY.  It is located very close to the state capital, Albany.  We will be helping this church to build a parsonage for the future pastor.  They have not hired a fulltime senior pastor yet, and most of the reason for that is because they need to be able to offer the senior pastor a parsonage in which to live since housing is so expensive in that area.  We look forward to serving with lead builder, Sean Genung and his family.  We will also be joined by two other builder families. 

We are excited to say that we will be moving to Guilderland around the first of November, which means little Asher will celebrate his first birthday in New York, and we will celebrate the fall/winter holidays there as well.  After investigating some of the important details, (is there an Aldi close by?  A Walmart close by?  A Starbucks close by?...etc.) I am glad to say that this looks like an exciting location for us.  We don't know that much about the church and it's ministries yet, but we look forward to meeting the people and understanding their unique passions for ministry as a church body!

Thank you for praying for us as we anticipate our move this fall!
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